Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘pain’


Image

“I deserve an explanation. I deserve an acceptable reason.” 

as Tony Gonzaga uttered her lines, tears started to fall. Again and again I am reminded of all the pain, all the hurt.

It’s been a couple of weeks since we last talked. I don’t really now what happened, I kept on asking myself why and what caused all of this. I can still remember the last time we talked, you never said that you loved me back when I told you that I love you. I should have taken that as a sign, I wanted to ask you if there was something wrong but the fear of hearing the answer got the best of me.

You suddenly left me hanging on thin air, now I don’t really know what to do. The past 8 years I spent with you was the best years of my life, how I decided to become a better person because you inspired me so much. I wanted to give you the best of this world, those things and experiences that you never had when you were growing up. I saw that this was coming, I just chose to make myself believe that there is forever. I held on to the promises we made, we will always hold on to each other.

I never really knew that it would hurt that much, I always thought that after all those things that I’ve gone thru, it would be enough to build myself an armor that would make me immune to all the pain. I guess this is the best time to accept the fact that there is no such thing as forever. I need to start letting go, I need to set my heart free. No matter how difficult this is, I have to do it. After you refused to answer all the emails, iMessages and phone calls, I’m taking everything as a sign that you don’t want to hold on to me anymore.  I was just hoping that you would give me the benefit of knowing what really happened, I thought after all those years of being together you could have given me the benefit of knowing the reason and why.

As I write this post, I feel like my chest is about to explode. You have no idea how difficult it is to pretend that I’m ok and show everyone that nothing is wrong. Beneath all the smiles and laughter, my heart is shattered and I am broken.

I guess what they say is true, all good shows must come to an end.

Once again I quote a movie line, “how do I unlove you?”

Advertisements

Read Full Post »